The cafe I work at celebrated its 16th year in business last night! Yahoo! And I stupidly volunteered as the cupcake girl.
It’s just that I have the tendency to go overboard a bit. You want a hundred cupcakes? How about three hundred?! You want one flavor? Nahh…I’m gonna whip up about twenty different varieties. I don’t care if you’re a color blind male…. you are gonna get purples, pinks, turquoise, sprinkles and hearts. And a whole lot of love.
It took all I had to stick to the agreed upon 100 cupcake limit…. and a big ass birthday cake. I made chocolate cupcakes and yellow cupcakes….with lots of different flavored buttercreams, ganache and mousse. There were lavender sugar sprinkles, mists of coconut, mousse fillings and energizing espresso. The cake was a three layered yellow cake, filled with chocolate ganache and mousse.
People, there were a whole lot of cupcakes….and they were rockin. But guess what? This whole damned town has gone gluten-free! Severe cupcake neglect was going on. I kept asking people, “why don’t I see you eating a cute cuppycake?!” Each person offered me the same answer I would have given….”I can’t have gluten.” Stupid stupid stupid. They have no idea what they missed out on ….and when no one was looking, I said “ta hell with it”…and ate one. Perfection. Totally worth the gluten-induced tummy ache. Woosies.
Maybe cupcakes, booze, and crazy people aren’t the best combination. It started with one…..one perfect teal cupcake soaring through the air. Then another…this time it was a precious purple one being slammed into my boyfriend’s ear canal. People started going down…and I was yelling “NOOOOO”, just barely holding back the tears.
Then someone pegged me hard in the eye ball. They squished it right in there, making a tight seal. It made a noise like “phhhhick” when I plucked it off. They were really lucky I didn’t knock their teeth out with my bunny ring, mmmmmhmmm. I can still smell the buttercream and angry adrenaline.
Just a suggestion. Don’t throw cupcakes at the girl who spent hours bent over them. Especially if the girl’s favorite word is “slice”.
I love how the “happy” is so happy that it just wants to leap off the cake. Love you all…and don’t throw cupcakes! I also love my gorgeous and fiery readheaded photographer, Evan Lentz. Yes I Do.



















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